You and Me

This is a very special poem for me. For the first 4 lines I thank my dearest friend Susan Joseph.

You: Saw you this morning
With that look in your eyes…
I hate to see you looking,
Lost and lonely…

Me: My mind is grazing
Idly upon despair.
I fail to retrieve harmony
And my core seethed in pang.
Someone led me through
The silver fields of rapture
And flawed my love,
Upon the flowing rails one day…
Beneath the gray clouds,
I sat and wept forlornly.

You: A tear drop veils your face
From my vision.
Past then became a haze
That kept shadowing my mind.
And my wings are tied with
The strings of misfortune.
I long to free them,
And plunge into the pain in your eyes.
But I bear in my soul,
The burden of my history.

Me: My love was a flower
Which withered away.
But the odour remained
To bedamn the moments down.
No ray of hope
Ever struck my oriel.
Cuddling my pallid dreams
And silent ails,
I pass my days in exile
In the clink of decay.

You: Life took me through days
Where sun never rises.
I jaunted through
The garden of earthly delights.
Then beheld your footprints
In the sand behind me.
Failing to find them,
I savored the essence of
Repression and amnesty
And dozed off.

Me: The lunatic imprisoned in me
Rises in rebellion.
Following a laughter,
I burst into tears!
Dark sea is roaring
In front of my eyes.
Deep asleep in me is my vision
In the table of accessories,
I’m searching for
An instrument of painless death.

You: I’m burning in the thought
That you are alone…
Why cannot I be near?
Why cannot I do anything for you?
Will your eyes shower
The tears of clemency?
Will your credence
Return to me forever?
With prayer on my lips
I await your riposte.

Me: I’ll come sailing
The vicious sea of time
Passing the tower of relics
Covering light years.
With tattered dreams in my soul
And ravaged vision in my eyes.
Will your arms shroud me,
Within the warm ramparts of compassion?
Will you offer me the love,
I long for eternities?

You: Wait beneath the rainbow
I swear you my love!
Let the gleam of my eyes
Be your salve.
Let it be with you,
In all your solitude.
As the gloom of fall
Crimsons your cheeks,
To give wings to your dreams
I’ll come.

2 Colleges and Myself

Dark clouds were up in the sky when I bid farewell to the college. That college, the one which got used to my footsteps as I passed by for the last two years. Yes, it won’t have to hear my taps again. I know I was not faithful to it. Never thought of loving it. Never held it dear. Never found it special although I was possessed by the one I studied earlier.

My mind was full of questions when I entered it first and the questions still remain. “What have I gained from this college?” I think. Still no answer…A post graduate degree, is that all? No, it taught me never to get broken when you are desolated. That no friend is ever reliable. That no enemy is ever perilous. That no truth is ever final.

Yes, it pains when you invest all your hopes and dedication and gains frowns as the interest. It pains to hear the unpredictable words from allies. It pains when you are misjudged. It pains when your honest voice ends up as a wail of hyena in the dark depths of life. Yes, still it pains…

My Bishop Moore as I told earlier possessed me. It still makes tears come to my eyes. I feel again like the child just entering the new world breaking the pupal shell of prejudices. I still stand on its courtyard with eyes filled with wonder. The hopes I cherished when I first entered it to the anguish I pampered when I left it.

Never felt that its so great a place to study when I studied there. But when I behold now, behold to the past, I know my love for Bishop Moore. Although there are sore events to be remembered the contentment that my college offered is unaccountable. The plans made overnight for the coming day. A new celebration each day. Escapades to library. Mischiefs at hostel. Celebration, celebration and more celebration.

I’ve always felt that my college is a living thing. It has emotions and language of its own and I’ve always understood what it conveyed. As Chetan Bhagat said in Five Point Someone “Although I've graduated and passed out my mind is still there”, its still at my dear dearest Bishop Moore.